redeem the time

So!

2008-07-14T13:33:00.000-07:00

Now that I am a married woman (hehe), I have a new email address. My blog is linked to my email address, so. . . I am changing my blog address. Please make a note of the new website:

Our Cozy Robbins Nest

I will start posting there this week. Please be patient until I getting looking a little more homey like this blog. My husband happily takes up some of the time I previously spent blogging. See you all soon!

Yeah! We Did it!

2008-07-10T12:54:00.000-07:00

It's official! We are married. . . And what a wonderful day/weekend it was!

As we were flying back to North Carolina, Mike and I were talking. I can honestly say it was the very best day of my life! I wish you could get married every year! I will post pictures as soon as I have them, but I wanted to let everyone know we were alive and married.

Also, I wanted to thank our amazing friends and family. The day was so fun and so smooth only because of the amazing help of all of our friends! You guys are the best!!!!!!

What Really Matters. . .

2008-06-30T16:41:00.000-07:00

God has been teaching me this week about what really matters. . . I have had a few trials as I have prepared for my wedding-

My contacts must have come from a bad batch, and so I have been having double vision in my right eye.
I had my hair colored and was not communicating well, so my hair turned out differently from how I had anticipated. Not bad- just different from what I had pictured.
My dress ended up getting altered slightly oddly, and didn't look like the way I had imagined.

Through it all, God has really been protecting me and keeping me from worry. Whether my vision is "just right", whether my hair looks "just right", whether my dress is "just right" are insignificant considerations and not what really matters. And I have every assurance that I will not even remember them five years from now, or even a year from now. But I will remember the excitement, the anticipation, the joy. God has graciously given me a good man to share my life with and to minister to and alongside. Please pray that I will remember to keep focused on that.

My First Pig Picking!

2008-06-29T15:25:00.000-07:00

When I was in North Carolina, my soon to be father-in-law threw us an engagement party, Southern style. . . A pig-picking! We had a great time with all our friends from church, and I loved meeting the people who had known Mike all his life. Here are some fun pictures from the day.

Who Do You Hate?

2008-06-27T22:27:00.001-07:00

About a month ago, my friend shared an awful story with me about a women who was assaulted and abused in just absolutely abominable ways. . . The story has stayed with me that whole time and I often think of this woman and what that would be like and how I might respond in her situation. It causes me to praise the Lord that he has not chosen to grow me through a situation such as this. . . But something else stands out to me even more.

My friend shared that the woman has really struggled with God and faith through these circumstances. An unbeliever, she has always struggled with the idea of God's sovereignty. This has been sort of the deciding factor. How could we love and serve a God who would allow, and even cause, something like this to happen? It has made her, and many others in like circumstances, lash out at God and even hate him. In her anger and grief, she has completely turned her face from God.

What a trick the devil has played on us! Instead of hating Satan, hating sin, hating our own inherited depravity- he has caused us to hate God. I have to stop and really think about this. Sin came into the world through Adam and taints literally everything in this life. We should hate that sin passionately and fiercely while fighting for light and goodness. Our only hope in a world corrupted and poisoned is the hope we have in Christ. Through his sacrifice, we have an eternal promise and an inheritance in the light. . . That light should shine in us in the dark places and difficult times all around us. . .

This instance, and every instance of darkness from the prince of evil, causes me to desperately need my savior and to cling to the promise he left has left us with:

John 17:13
"I am coming to you now, but I say these things while I am still in the world, so that they may have the full measure of my joy within them. 14I have given them your word and the world has hated them, for they are not of the world any more than I am of the world. 15My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one. 16They are not of the world, even as I am not of it. 17Sanctify them by the truth; your word is truth. 18As you sent me into the world, I have sent them into the world. 19For them I sanctify myself, that they too may be truly sanctified."

Dum, dum, de, dum. . .

2008-06-26T19:29:00.001-07:00

That was my attempt at the wedding march. Sadly, that is probably closer to the melody than if I sang it! As my big day approaches (a week from Saturday-9 days, but who's counting?), I find myself finishing last minute details. . . Today I went to the dentist. I made an appointment for an oil; change. And every time I cross something off my list, I think, "This is the last time I will do this. . . as Sarah Herbert." It sounds so morbid, almost as if I am dying.

But then, I remember that in a way I am. At my shower, my friend Beth said it well. It's not two people coming together and taking two pieces to make a new whole. Marriage as a believer is creating something new together. We used to be two single people, but now we are one family. A family that will be built one day at a time, by the grace of God. It's pretty cool. . .

Please pray for me as each day brings me one day closer to our new family.

So Productive. . .

2008-05-30T08:19:00.000-07:00

Last night, I started off the summer with a bang! I started (and finished) a little scrapbook of Mike and I's story. I took the story that I wrote for here on the blog, and journaled it onto the pages. Then, I added little quotes about love and pictures of us together. It's super simple, and might need a few more embellishments. BUT! It's done and I am pretty happy with the almost finished product. . .

I will try to take some pictures of it and post them on the website.

Now, I am going to start working on a scrapbook of all the fun wedding plans I have done- my showers, dress fittings, my bachelorette party, going to the Bridal Fair with my sisters, getting our nails done, and getting ready the day of the wedding. . . Always good to be working on something!

2 More Days. . .

2008-05-22T21:57:00.001-07:00

. . .of school left! We just have this Friday and then this coming Tuesday left. Kindergarten graduation is first thing on Wednesday morning. Then, it's just packing my classroom up and getting ready to move.

So- you should be seeing more of me in the very near future! Especially now that invitations for the wedding are out and we are just waiting to see who is going to be able to make it! Don't forget to RSVP and sign the guest book: http://Sarah-Mike.net .

Thanks for Your Votes!

2008-05-17T09:21:00.000-07:00

We did decide on a picture for our wedding invitations. Were ordered them earlier this week and they were sent on Friday. So, after Mike leaves on Sunday I will be hard at work finishing putting the invitations together so they can go out this week.

Those of you that voted, we are going to wait and let everyone be surprised when they see them. Hee Hee. . . Check your mailboxes this week!

Good Friends, Good Times

2008-05-17T09:18:00.001-07:00

Last night, some of my wonderful friends from my old school threw me a bridal shower. We had such a blast! There was tons of catching up, yummy food, and laughter. One of the most special parts was seeing all of my old students as well as my Fun Club girls.

They put together a video quiz of questions to see how well Mike and I know each other, and then people had to try to guess our answers. It was hilarious! And. . . We passed with flying colors so we are allowed to get married!

Thank you to my wonderful friends, Alyssa, Laura Boever and Jill for such a fun and beautiful shower!

Here are some pictures of the event. . .

Oh Happy Days. . .

2008-05-13T10:17:00.000-07:00

Mike and I took our engagement pictures of Sunday at a park near my house. . . We are trying to decide which picture to put inside our invitations. Any votes?

It's the Law. . .

2008-05-12T20:49:00.001-07:00

Well, maybe not yet- but we are getting close!

We went to the courthouse and got our marriage license today. So, we have one year to tie the know.

And, as a special coincidence, we were having dinner tonight at our friends' house. Mike and I actually met for the first time at Mike and Susan's house, so we took a few pictures to commemorate the memorable days events. . .

Showers of Blessings

2008-05-12T17:11:00.000-07:00

Last weekend, my dear friends from church threw me a bridal shower. It was soooo much fun. Don't get me wrong, the presents were great. But what was most precious to me was the time with people I love.

My friend, Beth, shared a devotional on wisdom on marriage that I hoped spurred all wives, and women, to love the Lord better through their relationships with others.

We had a couple hours taken out of the business of life to just hang out together. I love to see women just sitting and relaxing together. We snacked and talked and snacked and talked and laughed, and then talked some more! There is such an amazing diversity of life experience and wisdom in our fellowship which I just love to soak up. . .

Here are some pictures of the fun times.

Thanks for a wonderful time, friends.

A Graduate at Last!

2008-05-12T16:52:00.000-07:00

Thank you all so much for your prayers and support with my Master's defense last week. All went well, and I am a graduate (almost). I just have to wait for my diploma to come in the mail later this summer, and then it is official!

Mike took a picture of me with my poster that presented my research for the committee, in case you want to check it out. . .

Feeling Guilty. . .

2008-05-12T00:21:00.000-07:00

I have been catching up on my blogging girlfriends tonight, and it made me feel guilty! Thanks Laurie, Kendall and Shelley!

You are all so busy, and yet you manage to keep us all updated which makes me feel connected to you and what the Lord is doing in your life. Vicki and Andrea both were reminding me last week of the importance of developing consistency.

I am just so lazy! I could use Mike being here or the pressures of work as an excuse, which I do, but please pray for me to be more consistent in everything this week. . . Thanks for your faithful reminders, gals.

Fashion First

2008-04-29T20:12:00.000-07:00

My friend Julie posted this quote over at Life Out Loud. It came from John Piper; here's the link to the whole she-bang. . .

“ God ordains clothes to witness to the glory we have lost, and it is added rebellion to throw them off.

And for those who rebel in the other direction and make clothes themselves a means of power and prestige and attention getting, God’s answer is not a return to nudity but a return to simplicity (1 Timothy 2:9-10; 1 Peter 3:4-5). Clothes are not meant to make people think about what is under them. Clothes are meant to direct attention to what is not under them: merciful hands that serve others in the name of Christ, beautiful feet that carry the gospel where it is needed, and the brightness of a face that has beheld the glory of Jesus.

… our clothes are a witness both to our past and present failure and to our future glory. They testify to the chasm between what we are and what we should be. And they testify to God’s merciful intention to bridge that chasm through Jesus Christ and his death for our sins.”

Those of you that know me, know that I love clothes and shoes. It's just a fun hobby for me. This post was a great reminder to me on how we can consider the Lord in all things. It reminded me of the verse in 1 Corinthians 10, " 31 So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God."

I need to have this attitude in everything I do. I love the phrase above, "a return to simplicity". It reminds me of being a kid. I had one outfit for each day of the week and I rarely thought about which was which or which should be worn on which day. This should be my thought, or lack of, as a believer.

I want my hands and feet to be beautiful messengers of God's grace and lovingkindness, regardless of my jeans or high heels. . .

Great Book!

2008-04-25T13:37:00.000-07:00

I just read a really awesome book for my book club. It was called Reconstructing Natalie by Laura Jensen Walker. It is not a book I normally would have picked up, but since it was a book club read. . .

The book is about a 27-year-old single woman who finds out she has breast cancer. The book tells of her experience, including her relationship with God as she faces the battle before her. The book is equally heart-warming and gut-wrenching, and I could not put it down! A little heavier than light summer reading, but well worth your time!

Let me know if you read it, and what you thought!

What Next?

2008-04-25T13:32:00.001-07:00

Well, I have to say I am fairly proud of myself for actually sticking with something! I managed to get the whole story out there. Of course, with a fiance as marvelous as mine, the words are easy to write!

What next? It really helped having a topic to focus on write about. I will be thinking about that over the next couple of days and we will see what I come up with!

Falling, Falling Fall...

2008-04-25T13:30:00.000-07:00

Fall 2007

Finally! A happy ending. . .

Sarah's Story

Last fall, I went to North Carolina for Matt and Andrea's wedding. I was there for a weekend and had a great time visiting friends and sharing in Matt and Andrea's joy. I stayed with our friends, Mike and Pam Feather. After the visit, I wanted to do something to thank them for their hospitality. I emailed Mike to ask if he knew a restaurant they liked. We arranged for me to send him the thank you card and he would get the gift card to give them for me. Through this process, we started emailing. One Sunday night in October, he called to work out a few details and we ended up talking for two hours. We talked about a few things going on in our lives and I agreed to send him the money for the gift card that week. As a thank you for his efforts, I also made cookies to send.

The following week, he called to let me know that he had received the cookies and the check and we ended up talking for another two weeks. . . Thus began a bit of a pattern.

Mike's Story

After seeing me and renewing our friendship, Mike had serious reservations. He was still a little bit burned by my previous rebuff and wasn't sure he wanted to chance me again. However. . . In my box with the thank you card and the cookies, I also included a little note. As an after though, I had tagged on "I enjoyed our Sunday evening calls". Mike says that was when he knew that it was all over for him. After that, we started talking more regularly. At the beginning of November, Mike told me he was still interested in me, and we agreed to start pursuing a relationship. Over Thanksgiving weekend, he told me he loved me. . .

After that, the rest is history! Come July, we will be a happily married couple, praising the Lord for his mercy and kindness that have brought us together. Now you are up to speed, and I am happy to share the rest of our story with you alongside us. . .

Spring is in the Air Again. . .

2008-04-24T17:41:00.000-07:00

Spring 2007

Sarah's Story

This section is just my side of the story. . . From the time that Mike said he was interested in me, and I turned him down, we continued to be friends. We would call or email occasionally, but nothing much more than that.

That following Spring, I remember sitting at my friends' house (the Anderson's- their little girl is our flower girl) babysitting. My friend Matt had recently started dating Mike's friend Andrea. They were getting pretty serious. Matt and I had been emailing about a recent trip to visit Andrea in North Carolina. In the course of that, I asked how Mike was. I had started to think that maybe I had missed out on a really great opportunity and was having serious regrets.

Matt picked up on my meaning right away and promptly rebuffed me. He told me he thought that Mike and I "were not a good fit" and encouraged me to continue to wait on the Lord and pray for contentment. . .

It's Summer Time!

2008-04-23T17:54:00.000-07:00

Summer 2006. . .

Sarah's Story

I went to the East Coast for about 5 weeks while I was on summer break from school. While I was out there, I had the opportunity to visit the church plant in Greenville, North Carolina for about a week. My trip started out with a chaotic train trip that lasted over 12 hours- longer than my flight to Scotland a few weeks earlier! Mike had been tasked to meet my train, and ended up waiting for me that whole time while I was delayed repeatedly. Mike and I had a chance to talk many times over the week. (He kept paying for my meals, too, which made me think he might be interested but he promises it was just "Southern hospitality"). My last day, Mike offered to take me to lunch and then to my train. After a leisurely lunch at Panera, we went to meet my train only to realize I had the wrong time. Mike drove me halfway to DC to catch my train. How can you not think a guy like that is great?

Mike's Story

During the time that we were together that summer, Mike started to develop an interest in me. After I went home, we kept in touch with occasional emails and phone calls. He used to psych himself out to talk to me- for good reason! After a few weeks of intermittant calls, he admitted (in his words) that he had "developed a fondness for me". He asked me what I thought about it. I thought that just meant he thought I was cool and he wanted to keep getting to know me, kinda like we're both believers and there's no one else so let's give it a shot. At the time, I was starting a new school year and was really overwhelmed by work and the thought of a relationship, particularly long distance, was just too much for me. But I did tell him I still wanted to be friends.

So ends another chapter. . .

That Next Spring. . .

2008-04-22T19:49:00.000-07:00

The following spring, we met up again. . .

Mike's Story

Mike stayed with our good friend, Matt Sutton, when he came out to Arizona to go to New Covenant's family camp. On the drive up, Mike and Matt were talking about what characteristics they like in girls and what they might want in a wife. After listening to Mike's list, Matt suggested that he try and get to know me over the weekend, because I sounded a lot like what he was looking for. Mike, very diligently, tried to get to know me over the weekend. . . He even went so far as to tell me he was going to play basketball, hoping I would come watch. Not remembering him saying that, I went anyways to shoot the breeze with the girls. He was showing off his stuff, thinking I was watching. Little did he know that I barely know the net from the ball!

Sarah's Story

That family camp, I was in charge of the children's activities. I was fairly well consumed by taking care of that. I do remember meeting Mike in groups at dinner, and him offering to help with some kids' crafts one afternoon. What really stands out in my mind, though, was the campfire the last night. Right as I was preparing to go to bed, Mike offered to eat a bug for entertainment for anyone who wanted to watch. . . Again, interesting skills of provision. I remember walking to bed with my friend, Laura, and saying to her that it was going to be really hard for him to find a wife if he kept going around eating bugs and that I was never going to kiss someone who went around eating bugs!

Little did I know. . .

How it All began . . .

2008-04-21T08:04:00.000-07:00

Three years ago, in August. . .

Mike's Side

Mike came to Arizona to meet with Geoff Volker and spend time learning about New Covenant theology. On the schedule was also a church Bible study. At the Bible study, I was playing with some kids. Mike remembers thinking to himself, "Boy, that girl will be pretty when she grows up. . ." Imagine his surprise at learning I was already full grown!

Sarah's Side

I remember Mike introducing himself to me at the Bible study. He tells me now that someone interrupted us mid-conversation. . . Later that week, I was dropping some things off for my friend Samantha, Geoff's daughter, and his wife invited me to have dinner with their family and Mike. At the time, Mike was in the Air Force. He spent dinner regaling us with tales of his survivor skills. I remember thinking to myself, some day there will be a girl who thinks that is a great and unorthodox way to provide for and protect a family. I am not that girl. . .

And that was the first time we met each other. . . more to come. . .

Without Further Ado. . .

2008-04-19T18:53:00.001-07:00

For all those patiently waiting, I finished typing out Mike and I's story. Starting tomorrow, I plan to post one part of it each day for the next week. Tune in to see how the Lord has graciously brought us together.

I'm totally getting married. . .

2008-04-18T20:11:00.000-07:00

I KNOW! It's crazy! I booked the church and the reception hall this week, and ordered the invitations.

No backing out now, Mike. . .

Cute story? Mike is looking for jobs here in Arizona and he found this company he really likes. So he has been researching them before he called about openings. On Thursday, we talked right before he was going to call and he was psyching himself up for the big call. When I asked him how he felt about it, he said it reminded him of how nervous he used to be when he would call me up to talk before we were together. . . Hopefully, they like him almost as much as I do. I think it's a good sign.

If you think about, pray that it would go well. I know Mike is anxious to hear back from people here. The Lord's timing is always perfect though. . .

Slacker. . .

2008-04-18T20:06:00.000-07:00

First off, thank you all for your continued prayers for my health. God has truly been gracious and heard them. After a horrible series of tests, the doctors found out I had a bacteria in my intestine and bowel that was causing severe digestive complications. So! I am on antibiotics and for the first time I am feeling back to myself after six plus weeks of yuck. . .

God is so gracious. He has truly provided and been my peace in this. He has been so good to me even in my sickness. I was able to work, and schedule my appointments around work. The Lord has kept me in (relatively) good spirits despite everything else. And he has given me such comfort through my caring friends. . .

So now that I am feeling like myself again, we will see how regularly I am back here.

Please pray. . .

2008-03-23T14:43:00.000-07:00

. . .for me.

I have been sick for almost three weeks now, and we have no idea what is wrong with me. I started being sick after a bad reaction to an antibiotic I was given for throat concerns. As soon as I realized I was feeling poorly from it, I stopped taking it. Unfortunately, that didn't seem to help. Every time I eat, I'm sick within the hour. I know it must be bad because I am starting to lose weight which is not an option for me!!

Normally, when I'm sick I like to withdraw and mope around until I feel better. This time, with my trip to visit Mike and his family, that wasn't an option. My friend Kendall posted last week on relying on God for everything. I have really seen God working on my pride this week through my illness. I had all these ideas and expectations for our trip and meeting his family but God just changed my heart and my priorities. He is causing me to depend on Him for everything, because there is nothing I can do. Praise God for that!

I'm going to go to the doctor this week, but please pray that they would find out what is making me so sick. Also, please pray that I would have a good attitude and would manage to get everything done that I need to, despite feeling poorly.

What's Up?

2008-03-23T14:36:00.000-07:00

I didn't forget about telling Mike and I's story- I am actually diligently working on it!

To tide you over, feel free to check out our wedding website: http://www.sarah-mike.net/. We are trying to save money everywhere we can with the wedding plans, so we are going to use the website to track our RSVP's to save on sending out response cards. I'm driving Mike bonkers because the website management page has a feature where I can see how many times people have viewed it. He's considering banning me from looking at it which might be a good idea!

We had a great visit while I was out there over my Spring Break. We had almost two fabulous weeks together! The Lord was gracious to bump me from my flight on Wednesday night so we got two extra days together and a free round trip flight! God provides all kinds of things in all kinds of ways. . .

Here are a few pictures from our time together in North Carolina. . .

Our Story. . .

2008-03-07T18:53:00.000-08:00

So a few people have asked me to tell Mike and I's story. I was thinking about a series of posts that tell how we met and interacted over the past two years. BUT. . . I want to have them all written before I start posting because we all know how I struggle with being consistent and sticking with my goals.

Those of you that requested- I'm in process! And, my dear fiance is going to be keeping an eye and adding his insights and editting so watch for his thoughts as well. . .

Wedding Plans!

2008-03-03T16:22:00.000-08:00

So, this week has been crazy!

I can't believe that I have only been engaged for one week. . . It feels like so much longer. Partly because we have been so productive. Here's what we have done:

Chose wedding colors
Found a photographer
Decided on a dress
Started asking attendants
Decided on cake
Decided on flowers
Finished my side of the guest list
Formatted save the dates
Assigned jobs to close friends
Chose music
Planned order of the ceremony

So, needless to say I have been on my toes. But do I focus on what I have gotten done? Nope. Because the church that we thought we would be using (great price, great space, reception room on site) fell through today.

Now, I know that God has everything in my life fully planned for my good and his glory. Apparently, on the menu today is sanctification! I think I am most excited for the ways that God will use my wedding, and my future marriage, to push me to be more like Christ. Please pray for me as I work on patience and trust this week. . .

More Happy Tidings!

2008-02-24T20:14:00.001-08:00

Just a little update- my amazing and wonderful and handsome boyfriend proposed while he was here visiting this weekend!

We had a wonderful weekend together. We had dinner with my family on Friday and then went to a Suns game (a surprise for him). Saturday we went hiking in Sedona and we took a break on this beautiful rock overlooking the valley. We were talking about how happy we were and how much God has given us and then he asked.

We are SOOO happy and excited about planning our big day. It's a big decision and I ask for your prayer.

That God would soften my pride and prepare me to be a loving and submissive wife
That we would be preparing ourselves to sacrifice lovingly for each other
That we would be able to honor God in this time of waiting

Please, please let me know if you have other areas from your wisdom that you would suggest we be mindful of. . . Thank you for your prayers and I will keep you posted on all our exciting plans!

Confrontation

2008-02-20T19:50:00.001-08:00

So, confrontation is really not my favorite thing. Even the thought of confrontation makes my stomach a little queasy. . .

I have to call my old school tomorrow to try and straighten out a misunderstanding with my retirement account and I am just dreading calling. . . I don't know why, but just the thought of it all has been bogging me down! I know at the heart of it is a fear of man, and a desire for the approval of other people. I've been praying God would help me to concentrate on my standing with Him, and my approval in his eyes not on my own merits but on the merit of Christ. . .

Pray for me if you think about it- I could use some shared courage. How about you? Ever feel that way? How do you combat it?

The Other Boleyn Girl

2008-02-20T19:11:00.000-08:00

Last year, a friend of mine highly recommended the book The Other Boleyn Girl, by Philippa Gregory. Given the writers' strike, as well as teacher appreciation week at Barnes and Noble, I finally had both the book and the time to read as well as ponder this interesting book. Also, the movie is coming out and it looks really good, so I wanted to read the book first.

The story follows the lives of Anne Boelyn, who eventually became the wife of the King of England, and her younger sister Mary. I love history, but prior to reading the story I was really unfamiliar with this period in English history. It was so enthralling! A few recurring themes arose from this book.

Ambition
From the onset of the novel, Anne Boleyn is singlemindedly focused on herself and her future successes. In a time when women had very little power, she used every means possible to advance herself. She decided she would be queen and allowed absolutely nothing to stand in her way. The feminist my mother raised was struggling against the believer who understands God's ordained roles for women. . . Her choices and her ambition had repercussions for generations of women to follow her- and not necessarily for good. I was forced to evaluate my own goals. What will be the consequences of my own ambitions? Will they advance the cause of Christ or are they simply advancing my own ambitions?

The Role of the Family

In this particular novel, family took precedence over everything else. When given the opportunity, Mary was willing to forsake all else- her husband, her queen and even her own conscience- at the demand of her family. She was willing to lie, steal, commit adultery and a host of other sins because the men in her family deemed it the means for accomplishing the best for their family. It made me think about my own family. I am not sure that I would go to the same lengths to gain the approval of my family, but am I tempted to compromise? And not just for the sake of my family, but for the approval of my friends or my coworkers. . . I am called to serve Christ, and if I cannot deny all else for the saking of knowing him and following his commandments, I am not in him and he is not in me. . .

Consequences

I was within thirty pages of the end of the book when I made a startling revelation. Anne Boleyn was on the verge of being beheaded and her sister Mary was praying for a pardon. When the pardon did not come, her sister was shocked at the lack of mercy displayed by the king. As she lamented the evils of the king to her husband, he finally rebuked her. Anne Boleyn was beheaded for sorcery, adultery, witchcraft and treason. She was guilty of all these crimes. Her sister was fully aware because she had participated in the crimes and witnessed them firsthand. Anne Boleyn was not deserving of clemency because she had committed the crimes for which she was being punished. I had been rooting for Anne all along, but without perspective. . . I too am guilty of all the crimes I have been accused of, and more which I cannot even fathom. But I am not judged by the King of England or even the President of the United States. I fully deserve the death penalty for all these crimes. Yet my King is not like the King of England. My King knows full well of what I am guilty, yet has decided to pardon me despite it all. Worse! He has laid my sin upon and then beheaded his own son for my crimes. . . What a great and wonderful reminder of the unceasing mercy of God to his chosen people.

There is so much within this book that I could talk about, but I will leave it at that.

How about you? Have you read the book? What were your thoughts?

Books and Movies Galore!

2008-02-18T14:09:00.000-08:00

I've been reading a lot of fiction lately. I have been reading some nonfiction, but I just breeze through fiction. My friend Brian blames all this reading on the writer's strike! Thankfully, I can soon go back to mindless television viewing. . .

I thought I'd take a couple of minutes over the next week or so to review some of the books that I read while the strike was going on. . .

The first up will be The Other Boelyn Girl, by Phillippa Gregory- set to come to the big screen any day now.

Whew! Busy Seasons. . .

2008-02-18T14:07:00.000-08:00

. . .Seem to keep on coming! Between posting for Life Out Loud, my school blog, and here, along with all the other cares of life, I feel like I am always one step behind! Ever feel like that?

What's keeping you busy these days? What's been on your mind?

Happy Days!

2008-02-11T17:19:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago, my dear older sister got engaged to her longterm boyfriend! I am so excited for them. They are getting married next spring and my family couldn't be happier to include Mike in our family. Here's a picture of the very delighted couple!

And. . . To make matters ever sweeter, she has asked me to be her maid of honor! What a privilege and an honor. . . Check out the adorable way she asked me as well- by sending me this super cute little cookie along with a note.

Super Thoughts. . .

2008-02-02T18:04:00.000-08:00

Most people may have noticed that this Sunday is kind of a big day. People in my hometown of Phoenix particularly so. . . I, apparently living in a cave, was not so aware until about 2 weeks ago.

This Sunday, Super Bowl XXXXXLLLLLIV (maybe?) is being played just outside of a Phoenix. Now that I have been made aware of this most momentous event, I have a few random thoughts regarding the Big Game, in no particular order:

Did you know you are not allowed to "vote" for a team?
If you go to downtown Scottsdale, and sit in the far corner of the outside patio of the restaurant Sauce, you may or may not see someone famous who may or may not be here for the Bowl Game. . . They announced this on the radio.
Super Bowl Sunday is the day with second highest caloric intake, runner up only to Thanksgiving. . .
Apparently, it is a big party day. Perhaps my lack of knowledge about the event led to my lack of invitation to celebrate. Mike, am I allowed to call it a celebration?

This is my tribute to the wonderful day and all that it brings. . . Hope you enjoy the game; feel free to let me know any random thoughts you have about it.

Thinking about Suffering. . .

2008-01-30T17:26:00.000-08:00

For the last several weeks, I have been thinking a lot about suffering in the believer's life. Several circumstances have come up where it has been commented on that have made me question my understanding of it.

My friend Steven in North Carolina had some interesting thoughts after their church service in response to questions. What struck me was one particular statment he made in trying to articulate what suffering is for the redeemed:

"I would say that suffering is really the pain or distress (emotions) that one might go through when experiencing a trial. So suffering is actually the result of a trial or any difficulty we may experience. "

When I am going through a trial, I tend to focus on the feelings that come out of the trial. I get so bogged down in my anger, my frustration, my irritation, my sadness. I tend to cry out to God to remove the trial. In thinking about what Steven said, though, I've been challenged to change my prayers.

I don't honestly want God to remove the trial. Trials bring us closer to God in sanctifying us to become more like Christ. What I really struggle with are my emotions and how to respond Biblically to them. My pride is rearing it's head as I struggle with those bad feelings. . .

My sinful nature in my emotions has served to distract me from the more important issue of my growth. What I really need to do is ask God to change my attitude to manifest the fruit of the Spirit in trials so that I can focus on the actual circumstances of the trial and what I am intended to be learning from.

Hmmm... Now, let's just see if I can remember that the next time I have a trial! Feel free to remind me to redirect my focus.

Isn't He So Great?

2008-01-28T20:36:00.001-08:00

My very wonderful boyfriend, who I completely do not deserve, surprised me today and sent me flowers. But not just any flowers- edible flowers! It's like the best ever! Here's a picture of what they looked like. . .

They cheered up my desk most of the afternoon until I shared them with my students who were delighted to help me gobble them up! What a wonderful way to end a Monday! I'm sworn to secrecy over the card because he doesn't want to ruin his "tough-guy" reputation, but it was the best part of the surprise. . .

Hope all your Mondays were as nice as mine.

Thoughts on Prayer. . .

2008-01-28T20:23:00.000-08:00

I have been very blessed the last few weeks to be a part of a study through my church on prayer. Every other Monday for 4 Mondays, a group of women are getting together to talk about prayer as God intended revealed through scripture.

I have been so encouraged by the time that I thought I would follow it up here so that other's might benefit as well, Lord willing.

We started out by looking at the Lord's Prayer from the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew 6.

9"This, then, is how you should pray: " 'Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, 10your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. 11Give us today our daily bread. 12Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. 13And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.' 14For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins."

We broke that down to four main sections. The first section covered verse 9: "Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name". We spent some time looking at the verses in scripture that dealt with the idea first of God as Holy, and second of God as our father.

Afterwards, we spent a good deal of time in prayer, praying what God had revealed of himself back to him.

I don't know about you, but the thing I most often pray for is myself. Studying the passages related to God as my loving Father, as well as his perfect holiness, was very humbling for me. I committed to spending time in prayer each day for the next two weeks until we met again focusing on God's holiness and his fatherly care. . .

What a difference it made in my attitude and in the way I treated those around me!! When I took my eyes off of myself and placed them where they belonged, it was radically different. I was reminded that this is the abundant life I was called to- a life dedicated to and focused on my savior not myself. . .

I will post some of the verses we talked about, and then in two weeks I will post on the thoughts from tonight and their impact on me. . .

My Sweet Little Guy. . .

2008-01-14T20:21:00.000-08:00

James 4: 13

13Now listen, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money." 14Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.

So, last week my oldest fake nephew turned 5. . . Here are some pictures from his birthday party. I can't believe how big he is getting. . . What a reminder of how fleeting time really is. . . Not only is my little guy growing up faster than I can blink, but time in general is passing more quickly than we can comprehend.

I'm reminded of why we are given this short time here: to praise and make known the Lord.
Do I make sure that in everything- my time with my nephews, my time at work, my time in general- to remember that these moments are really that, just a few quick chances to make the most of what I have been given.

Highly Recommend

2008-01-12T19:35:00.000-08:00

I wanted to take a few minutes to highly recommend an online study that my friend Paul is hosting for the next three months. . .

He's going to be hosting a book discussion on the book The Unfolding Mystery by Edmund Clowney. The book is a look at the Old Testament. For those of you local, Paul will host discussion three weeks out of the month, and the fourth week people will meet to discuss face to face. For those of you long distance, you could participate in the online portion.

I wish I could participate, but I'm not sure I have room on my nightstand for one more book study book!

Cast Your Vote Now. . .

2008-01-12T19:20:00.001-08:00

So Mike and I were talking as I did my last post, and he mentioned this You Tube video.

Tell us what you think: funny or no. Then I will let you know our response!

This one is for Thomas. . .

2008-01-12T19:17:00.000-08:00

Ok, the last one was for Rayna, this one is for Thomas. . .

You gotta watch this first one, and then this second one, for the full effect. . .

Thanks Heather!

Hello Hello!

2008-01-10T17:54:00.000-08:00

All right, so we are all very clear that consistency is not my strong point. . . I could make a resolution to be more consistent, but I'm not even very good at resolving consistently!

So. . . Here I am again. . . We'll see how 2008 goes!

In Keeping with this Week's Theme. . .

2007-10-29T18:07:00.001-07:00

Heather sent me this today, and I knew Thomas and Rayna would get a kick out of it!

Supermarket Scarecrow

Feeling Fall and Festive!

2007-10-28T20:15:00.001-07:00

Check out the great pictures from our pumpkin carving contest this evening. Hopefully, it will become a fall tradition. . .

My sister and her long distance entry

Paul and Alyssa with their happy/scary bat pumpkin. . .

Team Cazares with Frankenstein brought home the Best in Show! It pays to be prepared- Rayna came with her own tools and sketch! Gotta love a girl who's ready.

Pumpkin Carving in action!

Scooping out pumpkins guts. . . Ewwwwww. Sophie had to take over for me because it smelled SO horrible!

This is much more up my alley! Can you tell that it's a cat on a fence? Thomas did the BOO! on the back. . .

* * *

Just wait till December for the Gingerbread House Building Contest!!

Book Discussion

2007-10-22T16:53:00.000-07:00

My friend Mike Feather over at Discerning Mind is putting together a book discussion group. This is a great way to learn to interact with contemporary culture from a Christian perspective.

If you want to join in on the discussion from the start, come on over! I'll post more details once a book is chosen and the other logistics are worked out.

Pictures of our Trip!

2007-10-21T16:39:00.000-07:00

A little something to show you what we were up to. . .

We spent eleven days traveling around the East coast. We stayed with my sister in DC for three days, then went up to New York City for four days (including a surprise trip to see Sammy at school) and then rounded out four more days in DC.

The pictures today, and then later I will post on what I learned about myself from all this traveling!

Taking in a Broadway play in Times Square. . .

Molly refuses to make touristy faces on the Bedloe and Ellis Island Ferry. . .

Taking a river ride on the Potomac in DC. . .

Yikes!

2007-10-21T16:37:00.000-07:00

I know one thing I will never be accused of is consistency!

I just realized it has been quite some time since I have blogged. I guess that is just part of the ebb and flow of life. Sadly, I have had very little time for the reading or the writing of blogs!

Around my last blog, I was finishing out the quarter writing report cards and conducting parent teacher conferences. Then, my sister, Sophie and I went on a trip to visit my sister.

Thankfully, now we are back to school and back to our schedule! So here I am again, trying for consistency once again. . .

Far Better Than Me. . .

2007-09-03T06:00:00.000-07:00

My post on 1 Corinthians 7 starts with a story. . .

Several months ago, I was reading a blog entry that raised my dander. They were reviewing a book called "Getting Serious About Getting Married: Rethinking the Gift of Singleness", by Debbie Maken. Without having read the book, I got all hot and bothered about it. How dare some married person try to tell me about how to be single? And then to tell me that I was doing it all wrong, that I could really be married if I wanted to be? I was ticked! I bought the book just so I could read it and review how wretched it was.

Ahh. . . Ever read the passage about God giving grace to the humble and opposing the proud? I am repentantly the latter. So today for my reflections on 1 Cor. 7, may I quite humbly recommend to you the above mentioned book. I give it my highest stamp of approval.

This book has the profound potential to revolutionize the way a generation of God-fearing people view marriage, and God in his gracious provision of such.

I think that all believers, both the married and unmarried, should read this book and revel in the wisdom our Lord has provided through it. . . Debbie Maken offers practical wisdom on how God discusses singleness, how our culture has deviated from this, and our responsibility as a church to return courtship and marriage to their proper course.

Please, please, if you ever hear anything I say hear, hear this: this is a book we should all read and reflect on!!!

My New Favorite Song. . .

2007-09-02T23:43:00.001-07:00

And I didn't even get this from Joel! I found it all by myself. . .

Ever Feel Like You're Moving Backwards?

2007-09-02T23:34:00.000-07:00

Check this out if you have ever felt that way. . .

My dear exchange student S. shared this with me from one of her friends back home. . . It's a hoot and a half!

The Bread of Sincerity and Truth

2007-09-02T23:20:00.000-07:00

Oh if only I would learn to see my sin the way that God sees my sin. . . This was actually my passage from several days ago, but with the holiday weekend I am only now able to write about my reflections. . .

1 Corinthians 5
6Your boasting is not good. Don't you know that a little yeast works through the whole batch of dough? 7Get rid of the old yeast that you may be a new batch without yeast—as you really are. For Christ, our Passover lamb, has been sacrificed. 8Therefore let us keep the Festival, not with the old yeast, the yeast of malice and wickedness, but with bread without yeast, the bread of sincerity and truth.

As I think about the little compromises of the faith that I make every day, I am reminded again of the holy God that I serve and the way that he views sin. As I battle in this race for the prize, I have to constantly fight against the old yeast and strive to manifest the new yeast. I think about the banqueting table at the final Feast of the Lamb and am encouraged once again to continue to lay aside what my flesh says to pursue the truth of God's Word. . .

What I say about sin. . .

What God says about sin. . .

I say, what does it matter only this once. . .

God says,
"1As for you, you were dead in your transgressions and sins, 2in which you used to live when you followed the ways of this world and of the ruler of the kingdom of the air, the spirit who is now at work in those who are disobedient. 3All of us also lived among them at one time, gratifying the cravings of our sinful nature and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature objects of wrath. 4But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, 5made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved." Ephesians 2

I say, no one will ever know. . .

God says,

"7 Where can I go from your Spirit?

Where can I flee from your presence?

8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there." Psalm 139

I say, it's not really that big of a deal. . .

God says,

"9But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. 10Once you were not a people, but now you are the people of God; once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy.

11Dear friends, I urge you, as aliens and strangers in the world, to abstain from sinful desires, which war against your soul. 12Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us." 1 Peter 2

Thoughts on 1 Corinthians 4. . .

2007-08-29T20:38:00.000-07:00

17For this reason I am sending to you Timothy, my son whom I love, who is faithful in the Lord. He will remind you of my way of life in Christ Jesus, which agrees with what I teach everywhere in every church.

As I was reading just now, these words stuck out to me. Tonight I was reflecting on my speech. I struggle with exaggerating for the sake of story telling. Ultimately, my sin is my pride that wants men to esteem which is greater than my humility and reverence in light of the holiness of God.

Yet, I read the words of the apostle Paul and I am so convicted. According to all men, most importantly the men who knew him best while living an working beside him, Paul's way of life was in full accord with what he taught all of the churches.

Is my life in full accord with the gospel of Christ? Where do I cut corners? Where do I behave differently before different audiences? May I grow in the fear of the Lord and not value the praise of man. I pray that God would search my heart and reveal to me where my actions bring shame to the gospel of Christ by being out of sync with what the word teaches and I preach. . .

Did you know. . .

2007-08-28T21:12:00.001-07:00

Last night was a lunar eclipse? Or early this morning depending on your time zone. It would have been unwise for me to stay up late enough to see it, but I was looking at pictures of it on the NASA website today. . .

Thought I'd share. . . The one up top is from close to the end. Below is a time elapsed representation of the whole eclipse.

Here is an amazing montage from the Lou Giglio Indescribable Tour that makes me think about my God in a proper perspective given all of time and space. . . If you have an opportunity to see the complete presentation sometime, it is staggering. . .

I've got another one for you. . .

2007-08-28T21:01:00.000-07:00

Last we were talking about insects in kindergarten. This week we talk about spiders. . . We talked about trapdoor spiders today, and tarantulas yesterday. Here is the most amazing clip of a tarantula molting.

It made me thinking again of shedding the old life and taking on the new life in Christ. David Powlison talks over and over again in his books about putting off the old sinful behaviors and putting on the righteousness of Christ. . . The outward physical man is decaying as a manifestation of sin, but we will one day set it completely aside for our new life complete with a resurrected new body in eternity with God. So cool. . . I see it mirrored to a small degree here in nature. I hope it looks this cool then. . .

All Things are Mine. . .

2007-08-28T20:54:00.000-07:00

The title of this blog is straight from 1 Corinthians 3. . .

21So then, no more boasting about men! All things are yours, 22whether Paul or Apollos or Cephas or the world or life or death or the present or the future—all are yours, 23and you are of Christ, and Christ is of God.

Although there is much more than could be said on a great many topics (and please, comment, those who are reading along through 1 Corinthians), this short set of phrases caught my attention today. I think I am often caught by the larger statements in this chapter which address my particular sinful tendencies. Tonight is a night of simplicity though. . .

No more boasting- there is nothing to boast in because I have everything in Christ. How simple and yet how profound. Why would anyone boast unless he was trying to appear more than he actually is (by "he" I mean me!). I don't need to boast about what I have out of awareness of what I don't have because I have everything. I have everything that matters in that I have Christ, sharing in his death, resurrection and eternal life. And in that there is no boasting because it was a free gift of the grace of God. Whoa. Now I see why Paul would say we are to boast only in Christ. . . It is truly staggering!

What do I Really Know?

2007-08-27T21:16:00.000-07:00

Today as I was reading, I was really struck by the following passage in 1 Corinthians 2. . .

9 It is written: "No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him"—
10 but God has revealed it to us by his Spirit. The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God. 11For who among men knows the thoughts of a man except the man's spirit within him? In the same way no one knows the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God. 12We have not received the spirit of the world but the Spirit who is from God, that we may understand what God has freely given us. 13This is what we speak, not in words taught us by human wisdom but in words taught by the Spirit, expressing spiritual truths in spiritual words.

Isn't that amazing? Previously, I could only know my own self and my own thoughts. And even those I don't know clearly or even fully understand because of my own depravity. Yet God in the richness of his grace and mercy made his own self known to me. In fact, he gave me a portion of himself. The Holy Spirit lives inside, actively interceding within my consciousness to reveal to me the very truths of God.

How often do I pause to think about this during the day? To thank him for the gift of his wisdom which comes only from the enabling of his Holy Spirit within me? Too often, I boast in my own knowledge, becoming puffed up with pride and sense of self-accomplishment. Yet it is not so. It is only by the kindness of his loving hand guiding my thoughts that I know anything at all! Every time a spiritual truth is made known to me, or any truth that matter as all truth belongs to him, I should cry out in thanks!

That I Might Die a Slow Death. . .

2007-08-27T21:15:00.000-07:00

Philippians 2
1So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, 2 complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. 3Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. 4Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. 5 Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, 6 who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, 7but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. 8And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. 9 Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, 10so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

I have been struggling the last couple weeks as school settles into a rhythm. Not with school, but with my attitude and my sinful tendencies! It is so easy for me to get sucked into my sinful patterns. For me, it is so hard to avoid the negativity and the gossip that seems to find me at school. This has been a pernicious area for me, and I would appreciate your prayer for me as I work on this. . .

My God is so faithful. One area that has really helped me is to remember that this is my ministry. God has called me to serve here, and I need to view every aspect about my time in the work place as a ministry and a service to God. This is his very best for me and my call is to give my very best to him. . . I think about Christ and his ministry here on earth. As Paul says in Philippians, his example was one of servitude. If that was Christ's model for ministering to others, I want that to be my example of Christ to the world. I need to keep reminding myself every moment of every day: how can I die to myself so that Christ may live? How can I die to myself as I serve my students? How can I die to myself so that I can put my co-workers first? As I tackle my pride in wanting to think that I should have more, that I somehow deserve more, I reflect on 1 Timothy,

12I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me faithful, appointing me to his service. 13Even though I was once a blasphemer and a persecutor and a violent man, I was shown mercy because I acted in ignorance and unbelief. 14The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus. 15Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst. 16But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his unlimited patience as an example for those who would believe on him and receive eternal life.

I praise God for his mercy to me as a sinner, thanking him for repentance and the gift of the Holy Spirit to persevere another day.

False Trust in the World's Wisdom

2007-08-26T21:22:00.000-07:00

My plan is to read a chapter in the morning, reflect on it during the day, and then write about it at night. Just so you have an idea of the schedule, as I welcome your thoughts and suggestions on this intensely encouraging portion of God's word to us. . .

Tonight, however, I am reading ahead so that I can post 1 Corinthians 1 tomorrow morning. . .

There is a passage in this first chapter that always brings me to my knees before the throne of God. . . It strikes at the core of my pride and my own sinful tendencies. . .

18For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. 19For it is written:
"I will destroy the wisdom of the wise;
the intelligence of the intelligent I will frustrate."

20Where is the wise man? Where is the scholar? Where is the philosopher of this age? Has not God made foolish the wisdom of the world? 21For since in the wisdom of God the world through its wisdom did not know him, God was pleased through the foolishness of what was preached to save those who believe. 22Jews demand miraculous signs and Greeks look for wisdom, 23but we preach Christ crucified: a stumbling block to Jews and foolishness to Gentiles, 24but to those whom God has called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God. 25For the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength.

26Brothers, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. 27But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. 28He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, 29so that no one may boast before him. 30It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. 31Therefore, as it is written: "Let him who boasts boast in the Lord."

My business is the wisdom of men and of the world. And, to my shame, I am often held captive by it and prone to forget true wisdom. . . I am a teacher, specifically to gifted children. In a sense my whole job is to make manifest the wisdom of the world to the next generation. My sin comes in when I forget that this is just a job with a purpose of equipping young minds for a future with the ability to read about God and hopefully understand his good news. . .

I am so quick to buy into the foolish message of the world, and to begin to trust in knowledge instead of in the wisdom of God. . . I did it just this past month. I love my job. I am so passionate about gifted education and providing the important skills and services this special population needs. But sometimes, my passion exceeds Biblical wisdom. For the past year, I have been torn by what my heart desires and what practical wisdom reveals. I was accepted into a prestigious graduate program in gifted education that I very nearly coveted. But prestigious almost always comes with a matching price tag. While the education there would equip me for my job, it would require additional school debt. . . I was so torn. Freedom in Christ allows me to choose. It is not sin to take the classes and be part of the program. But practical wisdom says it is not wise. . . Being involved in the program would place a financial burden on me with repercussions into the future, not to mention drains on my time and limits to my opportunities to fellowship with other believers and evangelize in the relationships God has given. I know all this. . . Theoretically.

Oh the greatness of my pride and desire for esteem in the eyes of the world! Despite much prayer and counsel from wise friends in the decision to pass up this opportunity- I signed up for classes this fall. What was I thinking?? My first hint that this was not wise was when I hesitated to tell my friends and family. . . Now, I was more than ready to tell folks at work so that they would esteem and envy me. Oh my sinful heart.

Thankfully, God has not given up on me yet, nor will he ever despite my many failings. . . He so lovingly redirects me as fathers do. He reminds me of his true wisdom in stark contrast to that which the world holds high in time to save me from myself. . .

How easy it is to be held captive to the charms of the world. I pray God would cause me to be more vigilant, and that he would bring others alongside me to serve me through my own weaknesses and failings. I thank God for another day he has graced me with to try to better serve him.

Newsy Notes on a Sunday Night!

2007-08-26T20:34:00.000-07:00

Hey y'all (the lingering of a trip to the South),

Thank you all for your patience and kindness in this busy season of my life! Things with school have calmed down now, so I am committing to blogging again. Please hold me accountable! A few questions and highlights from my time away:

For those who were wondering, I absolutely LOVE my new job and the changes the Lord has brought through it. Why do I doubt him? He is so faithful and pours out his grace on me. . . Kindergarten is fun and exciting and exhausting all the time, but I love it! I am sure you will hear all kinds of stories from my little bitties and the way they keep me on my toes and praising my Lord (or pulling out my hair)!

How have you all been?!?! Are there any old faithfuls out there after my long dry spell? Any new readers? Please let me know if you are still hanging in there!

Are any of y'all still interested in going through 1 Corinthians together? My plan is still to read a chapter a day, and then proceed on to Ecclesiastes. . . I will start posting tomorrow on 1 Corinthians. Feel free to read and share along!

See you tomorrow for 1 Corinthians 1. . . May the Lord bless you and keep you in his perfect will . . .

What a Weekend!

2007-08-26T20:16:00.000-07:00

I just back from a wonderful weekend filled with friends and fellowship. My church here has an amazing sister church in North Carolina I have been blessed to visit last summer and this weekend. This past weekend, the two churches were wed- literally! One of their's married one of our's and it is a sweet, sweet union.

What a precious privilege the gathering together of other believers is. . . Every time I see it take place across cities, countries, or continents, I am struck by the privilege of being a chosen member of God's family. Although we may not share blood in our veins, we share the precious and powerful blood of Christ.

While I love my biological family, because they are not believers we cannot share the beautiful intimacy that is found whenever believers gather together. I thank God that he instructs us to meet together, and continually reminds me through his word and through practical experiences of why this is so important, as in Hebrews 10.

19Therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, 20by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body, 21and since we have a great priest over the house of God, 22let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. 23Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. 24And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. 25Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.

Being a part of God's family is part of believing in his Gospel. Fellowship is an active manifestation of the love we have for God at our own salvation. Today, especially, I thank God for the way he has drawn together a ragamuffin crew and made us into a family.

Amazing God in the Little Things

2007-08-22T21:22:00.000-07:00

So, I am currently hooked on insects. The cicada in particular. My class and I have been captivated by all things 6-legged since we spent twenty minutes watching a dragonfly zoom last week. We have been researching dragonflies, butterflies and such for days. . .

This sparked even more insight. Today, several boys brought me cicada moltings from a tree on our playground. I started looking them up so we could talk and write about them tomorrow. They are so amazing!! And my God who created them even more so. . . But first, the cicadas:

They have freakishly long life cycles- 13 to 18 years! Most of this is spent underground

Cicadas live the majority of their life underground, emerging in swarms for the purpose for procreation

Cicadas literally spring forth from their dead bodies. You gotta see it: www.cicadamania.com/video/

The male cicadas produce noises (which is what you hear all around right now) from their abdominal cavities for the purpose of mate selection

Each species of cicada has its own distinct sound

Some cicada species have a sound so loud it is inaudible to human ears

I could go on and on! And if you would like me to I will!

But what is the point? It is all well and good to study, learn, be fascinated by this amazing creature. However, the point of life in not in its creations. The point of life is to continually turn back to the Creator. I am so astounded by a God who could fathom to create an animal like this. Who could be so concerned with the well-being and sustainment of this creature as to create an 18-year life cycle, thousands of different reverberation patterns, the process of molting and so much more so that this one tiny little creature could continue to live. And the God who created the cicada has called me by name and made me his precious child. He cares infinitely for me. He has executed the same care over my life as that of each little cicada that sings.

Oh that I would rise up out of my dead body like the cicada and sing the praises of the great God and Creator. . .

I'm Back!

2007-07-26T21:51:00.000-07:00

Well, I thank you all for your comments of late about my lack of posting.

I just want to apologize! As way of explanation, we went back to school this week. The previous two weeks I came home each day from 8+ hours of meetings and classroom preparations, and was honestly too exhausted to even eat, much less blog. However, I should have taken the time to post about my time away.

With nearly one week under my belt, I'm hoping to be able to post at least every couple days.

Thank you all for thinking of me, and I appreciate your prayers as I navigate this busy season.

Huh.

2007-07-08T23:55:00.000-07:00

So, I was starting on my post for Isaiah 59 tomorrow, and I googled "Bible Gateway". Don't ask me why- I have it bookmarked as well as memorized. Anyways, I accidently googled it as an image instead of on the web. Look what showed up (pardon the quality; I was trying to enlarge it). . .

Yep. I've got nothing more to say to that.

(PS How come "googled" doesn't show up in the dictionary? It's my favorite verb. . .)

I Should REALLY be Sleeping!

2007-07-08T23:48:00.000-07:00

I have to be up at 7:30 tomorrow to take my car in to get worked on, so I should really be sleeping, but. . . I'm not!

I'm just sitting here in bed, still trying to digest everything from my wonderful weekend with my friends. I can't even really speak because I have so many topics to think about that my mind keeps skipping from one to the other like a joyful little bouncing pebble in a pond!

Seriously, it was a little like going to church camp in high school. Where you spend all that time thinking and learning and growing, then you come home almost high off the heights. It was a most marvelous weekend, and I will try to share over the week all of the thoughts that are going through my head as I process the new ideas we covered.

Do you have some friends that are like this? Who you can spend hours, days even, discussing life and theology and the practical aspects of your faith? If not, I will pray for you to find deep, deep fellowship like that. It is truly a blessing. . .

What is Our Proper "Fast"?

2007-07-08T17:55:00.001-07:00

Romans 12 sets a new standard of worship compared to that of the Old Covenant. The apostle Paul says, "1Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. 2Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will."

This passage came to mind this weekend. . . As I was reading over the weekend in Isaiah 58, I came to a passage that contrasts once again disbelieving Israel with true believers. This time, we see Israel seeking to do things for their own gain, instead of for God's pleasure. After describing their false piety, God paints a picture of what his true children will look like, and the magnificent rewards that await them. God does not want us to fast simply to get what we want. He wants us to fast to learn to desire what he wants. . .

6 "Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen:
to loose the chains of injustice
and untie the cords of the yoke,
to set the oppressed free
and break every yoke?

7 Is it not to share your food with the hungry
and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—
when you see the naked, to clothe him,
and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?

8 Then your light will break forth like the dawn,
and your healing will quickly appear;
then your righteousness will go before you,
and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard.

9 Then you will call, and the LORD will answer;
you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.

Far too often, I go to God like the unbelieving Israelite- fasting and weeping for my own selfish desires. I do not go to God fasting and weeping for injustice, oppression, the poor and down-trodden. Yet, Matthew 5 tells us that these are the people who will see the kingdom of God.

Our calling is to set a new standard of self-sacrifice- to offer our everything, our very selves, in worship of God. I have been thinking for the last two days on how I can do this. What do I have that I am unwilling to offer over to God? How can I work even harder to use my entire life as a spiritual service to the Lord? Right now, I don't know. But I am praying for wisdom revealed through the Holy Spirit and the word of God to be my guide. . . Check for updates as I try to discern these things. . .

How about you?

Christ-Centered Ministry that Hits the Mark

2007-07-08T11:51:00.000-07:00

I had the opportunity to listen to some pod casts by John Piper. . . If you haven't had a chance to listen to any of these, I highly recommend them. You can access them at Desiring God resources here.

One of the topics that we listened to concerned an interview that Piper had heard between a moderator, a Southern Baptist minister and an Islamic teacher. . . The actual interview is fairly irrelevant to this conversation however Piper made a statement that has stuck with me.

During the interview, the minister had the chance to talk about the love of God. However, based on his discourse, for all intents and purposes it appeared that he and the Muslim teacher agreed as they discussed on the love and nature of God. How can this be? After describing the interview, we learn why Piper was aghast. The minister made a critical error that I myself have made numerous times.

There is a simple truth that we as believing Christians are not at the luxury of forgetting. The majority of the world professes to love God. Whoever their personal God may be- Yahweh for the Jewish, Allah for the Muslims, Money for the Americans- everyone who serves a higher power by the name of "god" professes to love them. Our fatal flaw when we speak of God with any other person is to fail to bring in the name of Jesus Christ. This is the name by which every knee will bow, and every tongue must confess. Any ministry that we attempt to make that fails to have Christ at its center fails to serve Christ, and to fully serve God.

I am thankful for this reminder from John Piper that we must never fail to keep Christ at the center of our ministry, at the center of every evangelistic conversation and effort we might be blessed to have. . . As I meet and connect with those who do not know him, I pray this week that I will be mindful of Christ in my thoughts, actions and most importantly, in my speech.

Just an FYI

2007-07-07T11:52:00.000-07:00

I am out of town on vacation, and I will have a ton of great posts (at least I have been having some great thoughts that I would like to share), but I am kinda out of communication for right now!

I thought I would be able to post- but I don't want to! I adore my friends I am with, and we are having such wonderful fellowship that I don't want to minimize it by trying to post while I could be enjoying time with them!

Have a great weekend, and I will see you at the start of next week!

Tips?

2007-07-06T15:37:00.001-07:00

As I was walking out the door to go on vacation to visit some beloved out of town friends, I noticed that my floors were rather repulsive.

I don't even own a mop- I typically mop them with a sponge or rag on my hands and knees. And because I have a fantastic vacuum. they don't require a ton of attention; I only mop maybe every 6 weeks beyond spot mopping as needed in the kitchen. . .

How do you all mop your floors? Tips? Techniques?

Am I Mocking God?

2007-07-06T15:27:00.000-07:00

When we do not acknowledge God, what are we in effect doing? When we fail to acknowledge God in all of our ways, when we worship idols other than him, when we pursue that which is other than God, in essence we are spitting on God. We are saying that we cannot be satisfied in him, that he is not enough, and that we need more than what he offers to us. . .

Isaiah 57 states,

3 "But you—come here, you sons of a sorceress,
you offspring of adulterers and prostitutes!

4 Whom are you mocking?
At whom do you sneer
and stick out your tongue?
Are you not a brood of rebels,
the offspring of liars?"

For me, this passage was the wake-up that I needed. I am on summer vacation and have had a great deal of free time. As I prepare to return to school next week, I look back on the past summer. What have I done with the gift of time given by God? Have I used it to pursue God or have I used it to pursue pleasure?

In my summer, I see my pursuit of things other than God. Today, I see that I have been making idols inadvertently, and in that process mocking the grace and love of my God. The goal of my life is to be constantly dying to myself that I might know Christ more. I am my own biggest obstacle in my relationship with God. My pride and my selfishness keep me from knowing God as fully as I ought. It is a constant tug of war between pursuing my own selfish gain, or pursing my God. This passage was a wonderful reminder of what I am ultimately pursuing by my lack of pursuit of God.

I thank my God for revealing to me my sin, and for his promise of faithfulness to continue to sanctify me. How are you being sanctified? How are you finding ways to die to yourself and to know God more?

What Satisfies You?

2007-07-06T15:13:00.001-07:00

Yesterday, while I was reading Isaiah 56, I came to the following passages. . .

10 Israel's watchmen are blind,
they all lack knowledge;
they are all mute dogs,
they cannot bark;
they lie around and dream,
they love to sleep.

11 They are dogs with mighty appetites;
they never have enough.
They are shepherds who lack understanding;
they all turn to their own way,
each seeks his own gain.

In order to understand the context of this passage, let me elucidate on the beginning of the chapter. We are basically seeing the difference between the unbelieving Gentiles that God is allowing to enter the kingdom of heaven because of their true righteousness, versus the "chosen" people of Israel who do not truly possess saving faith or any real righteousness. The contrast is made between the righteous actions of those who were not even the chosen people of God against the actions of the Israelites who were theoretically God's people. How can you miss the message of Abraham's true seed here? This has profound implications for me as a believer in the New Covenant era. I am reminded again that culture means nothing when we are talking about real belief. It does not matter what you were born into, or your cultural background. . . What matters is the life that you have been given purchased by the saving work of Christ on the cross. . . Now that you are a believer, what will you do?

I look at the warning that is presented in the form of Israel and it reminds me so much of the corporate "Christian" church in America. Verse 11 says, "They are dogs with mighty appetites; they never have enough. They are shepherds who lack understanding; they all turn to their own way, each seeks his own gain."

This makes me think about my own appetite, and what I find that satisfies it. Am I constantly consuming the things of the world, yet never feeling fully satisfied constantly hungering for more? Or am I being satisfied by the living water of God, and the bread of life through Christ? If I am not being satisfied by the things of the Lord, I am no better than the unbelieving Israelites who professed to know God yet made no demonstration of that profession within their lives.

I confess that I have a great deal of room to grow in being completed by my God. Recently, one of the elders in my church said that if there is one thing we should be reckless and irresponsible in, it is our pursuit of God. This passage reminds me of that. I want to be characterized by a reckless abandonment of all other pursuits but that of the things of God.

How I do Bible Study. . .

2007-07-06T15:08:00.000-07:00

As Vicki mentioned the other day, I've kinda started an ongoing devotional on the book of Isaiah. In order to understand that, let me explain my typical pattern of Bible study, which I have found highly effective.

I read through a book of the Bible one chapter a day. Then, after reading through the chapter that day, I choose a verse or a short series of verses and reflect on them. What you hve seen here lately is a portion of that reflection. I highly recommend this method to you, as I have found it an intensely practical way to get a great deal from Scripture...

I will finish the book of Isaiah some time this week or next, and then plan to read 1 Corinthians, then Ecclesiastes. . . I'll try to continue sharing in this manner if it is beneficial to you all, and I will admit that it is causing me to be far more consistent as well!

Sticking with the Theme of Nature

2007-07-04T22:47:00.000-07:00

Those of you that know me know that I do not like holidays. I like the average, day to day existence. I like things that are manageable and within my control, and anything (like a holiday) that is outside the normal mundanes of life is just not for me. . .

That said, there are only two holidays which I even bother to celebrate and one is the 4th of July. I'm as patriotic as the next person, but really I just love fireworks. Something about them just usually does something for me.

I say usually because this year as I sat watching the fireworks I was kind of impatient for them to end. They just did not seem to hold me captivated as they have in previous years. I think part of it is that there is really not that much to be joyful about. Don't get me wrong, I love America! I am proud of our country and the lives lost over generations and within this current generation to make this the nation that it is. . .

But joy? Real joy. . . That I reserve for my Lord and Savior. I think on my God and my soul swells with a bubbling well of gladness. As I was reading tonight before bed, I felt that bursting forth that would normally have come from the lights in the sky that this day brings. . .

From Isaiah 55, this evening. . .

12 You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills will burst into song before you,
and all the trees of the field will clap their hands."

There was a British hymn we used to sing in church that came to mind when I read this passage and I have been humming it all evening as I contemplate the words of the prophet Isaiah;

WHEN LOVE CAME DOWN to earth
And made His home with men,
The hopeless found a hope,
The sinner found a friend.
Not to the powerful
But to the poor He came,
And humble, hungry hearts
Were satisfied again.

What joy, what peace has come to us!
What hope, what help, what love!

When every unclean thought,
And every sinful deed
Was scourged upon His back
And hammered through His feet.
The Innocent is cursed,
The guilty are released;
The punishment of God
On God has brought me peace.

What joy, what peace has come to us!
What hope, what help, what love!

Come lay your heavy load
Down at the Master's feet;
Your shame will be removed,
Your joy will be complete.
Come crucify your pride,
And enter as a child;
For those who bow down low
He'll lift up to His side.

What joy, what peace has come to us!
What hope, what help, what love!

Stuart Townend
Copyright © 2001 Thankyou Music

I hope in the coming days you will think about what really brings you joy, about what it is that makes your soul sing. I pray that it would be your Savior, and that if it is not you would draw closer to him for the realization. . .

Guest Bloggers!

2007-07-03T21:02:00.000-07:00

I was posting my previous blog, and my nephews (who are here having a "slumber party") wanted to come on as guest bloggers!

Jacob's Blog:
Thank you for the commenting, whoever you are!

Joshie's Blog:
glkl;k;lk;joshieefrewwsry5dtwefqn1dx43
(Translation- although I am not sure it will help) Sqwamo, Sqwamo, Sqwamo!!!

And for the viewers at home, a picture of the slumber partying. . .

Laundry, Again!

2007-07-03T20:52:00.001-07:00

Well, this was the start of my attempt at keeping laundry going more regularly in order to be more efficient. It's going pretty well, thanks for all your encouragement! I think it is going especially well because I had two very special helpers last night!

My nephews came by for dinner, and decided to stay to help out with the laundry after a little impromptu swimming. They take such good care of their auntie!

An especially sweet moment with my nephew. . .

He asked if he could help fold the towels, and so we gave him a washcloth to fold. After a little bit, he handed it back to me- exactly the way I fold them! I asked if that was how his mom folds them, and he said (paraphrasing) "No. I was just watching you and I thought you might like them folded like this." How precious is my sweet boy who's learning to be a servant leader! Look at the concentration on his little face!

A Little Break from Isaiah. . .

2007-07-02T23:31:00.000-07:00

It's getting kinda late out, but I'm soaking up the soon-to-be-ending late nights of summer (8 days and counting till I go back to school). I was just thinking about my God and all he has done for me, and this was the passage that came to mind.

Psalm 121

A song of ascents.

1 I lift up my eyes to the hills—
where does my help come from?

2 My help comes from the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.

3 He will not let your foot slip—
he who watches over you will not slumber;

4 indeed, he who watches over Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.

5 The LORD watches over you—
the LORD is your shade at your right hand;

6 the sun will not harm you by day,
nor the moon by night.

7 The LORD will keep you from all harm—
he will watch over your life;

8 the LORD will watch over your coming and going
both now and forevermore.

I grew up at the base of a series of mountains in a place that is no longer rural Arizona. . . My bedroom window for years looked out on the mountains and, as with much of nature, they spoke to my soul in a way only someone who knows the Lord can fully understand. Romans tells us that no one is without excuse because the whole realm of nature testifies to the existence of God (Romans 1: 20 "For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse.").

What a change in the quality of the relationship we have with nature in the time that we go from unbeliever to believer. Nature goes from condemning us to comforting us. My mountains which once towered above me as an ever present reminder of my own frail humanity now speak to me of the God whose help is my surety.

My Bible says that this is a song of "ascents". Now, theologically speaking, I have no clue what that means other than that someone added it at some point to try to help us out. But for me, this is a song of ascents, because it makes my heart want to sing. It lifts me up out of myself and causes my praises to ascent to my King anew for his goodness demonstrated to me by the world he created all around me to testify to himself.

Late nights are good. . .

Thinking about Independence

2007-07-02T15:26:00.000-07:00

On Saturday mornings, I host a book club for a group of preadolescent girls from my old school ranging from ages 9-11. We are going through a marvelous book that I highly recommend called See Jane Win For Girls, by Dr. Sylvia Rimm. I've linked it in case you want to know more about the book.

The basic idea behind the book is using the stories of successful women to help young girls really think through who they want to be and what they want their life to be about. We all have different definitions of what it means to be successful, especially as believing women, but I think we would all agree that it is a positive pursuit to know yourself and your goals better. I love this book, particularly, because it challenges me to think about who I want to be as well.

This week, we spent quite a bit of time talking about independence. I asked the girls to try to define independence, and we talked at length about whether or not it was a good quality to strive for. This conversation really got me thinking. Being raised by my feminist mother, my initial response to the question has always been an unequivocal yes. These sweet young girls made me think through it in a new way, which led me to think through it even deeper later, as a believer.

Being independent can be a good thing, in terms of having strong convictions, knowing what is important to you, and being freed from dependencies of various natures.

But being independent can also lead to arrogance, self-righteousness, and selfishness. Being independent can keep you from loving others, and from letting others into your life which will hinder your fellowship as well as your effectiveness in ministry.

I guess what it all comes down to is the same as almost any other debate. We must always strive for balance in that which matters the most. Sometimes, we cannot say yes or no. Most of life, and most of faith, is lived in varying shades of gray. . .

You Gotta See This!

2007-07-02T14:41:00.000-07:00

Okay, this is my first time posting a video clip, but I am going to try it. This is so hilarious! I have watched it at least a dozen times, and I still laugh at every time!

Watery Weekend!

2007-07-02T14:33:00.000-07:00

This weekend, my friend and I had a sleep over for some of the small children from church. We had such a blast! Our theme was something sort of ambiguous having to do with the ocean and water. We played water games, watched Finding Nemo, and pretty much just had a blast!

Here are some pictures of the highlights. . .

Comfort from Isaiah

2007-07-02T14:24:00.001-07:00

I have been so, so, so encouraged by the time that I have spent reading Isaiah. I have found it to be a perfect balance of God's wrath and God's mercy- convicting my heart of sin as needed, but providing grace and peace as well. . .

Today, I was reading in Isaiah 54,

"9"This is like the days of Noah to me:
as I swore that the waters of Noah
should no more go over the earth,
so I have sworn that I will not be angry with you,
and will not rebuke you.
10For the mountains may depart
and the hills be removed,
but my steadfast love shall not depart from you,
and my covenant of peace shall not be removed,"
says the LORD, who has compassion on you."

God is faithful as much as he is any other aspect of his nature. His promises are true, and when he says that he will not depart from me, he will not take away his peace, and he will have compassion on me, he means it with an earnestness that I will never understand. I am so thankful for the God that he is to me. God is the ultimate example of perseverance which encourages me to persevere for another day.

Just For Your Information

2007-07-01T21:56:00.001-07:00

A few gals from my church and our friends have started a collective blog. . . Here's the link if you would like to check it out.

I will probably be double-dipping for awhile during the time we are getting it set up. The goal is for each author to try and post once a week over there. So, although you'll be seeing me here regularly, but if you want to check out some of my thoughts over there as well, we'd love to see you!

What Does it Mean to YOU?

2007-07-01T17:44:00.000-07:00

1Who has believed what they heard from us?
And to whom has the arm of the LORD been revealed?
2For he grew up before him like a young plant,
and like a root out of dry ground;
he had no form or majesty that we should look at him,
and no beauty that we should desire him.
3He was despised and rejected by men;
a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief;
and as one from whom men hide their faces
he was despised, and we esteemed him not.

4Surely he has borne our griefs
and carried our sorrows;
yet we esteemed him stricken,
smitten by God, and afflicted.
5But he was wounded for our transgressions;
he was crushed for our iniquities;
upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace,
and with his stripes we are healed.
6All we like sheep have gone astray;
we have turned every one to his own way;
and the LORD has laid on him
the iniquity of us all.

7He was oppressed, and he was afflicted,
yet he opened not his mouth;
like a lamb that is led to the slaughter,
and like a sheep that before its shearers is silent,
so he opened not his mouth.
8By oppression and judgment he was taken away;
and as for his generation, who considered
that he was cut off out of the land of the living,
stricken for the transgression of my people?
9And they made his grave with the wicked
and with a rich man in his death,
although he had done no violence,
and there was no deceit in his mouth.

10Yet it was the will of the LORD to crush him;
he has put him to grief;
when his soul makes an offering for sin,
he shall see his offspring; he shall prolong his days;
the will of the LORD shall prosper in his hand.
11Out of the anguish of his soul he shall see and be satisfied;
by his knowledge shall the righteous one, my servant,
make many to be accounted righteous,
and he shall bear their iniquities.
12Therefore I will divide him a portion with the many,
and he shall divide the spoil with the strong,
because he poured out his soul to death
and was numbered with the transgressors;
yet he bore the sin of many,
and makes intercession for the transgressors.

Isaiah 53

Honestly, I titled this post what does it mean to you, because I don't really even know what it means to me. This is one of my favorite passages of Scripture because as intelligent as I am (or seem to think I am), I don't know what to do with the God of this passage.

This passage reminds me that the way that I focus my life is by taking a thousand looks at the cross for every look that I take at myself. That is how I make sure my life is manifesting the goodness of God. . . Seeing as I look at myself quite a bit, this motivates me to be constantly turning to and seeking the Lord through the remembrance of the cross.

Today, I just want to spend some time thinking about the cross. So, a short post, and a prayer that you too will be drawn to the cross to spend time with the one who gave so much to give you the privilege of coming into his presence. . .

How Beautiful. . .

2007-06-29T15:30:00.000-07:00

Well, today's reading in Isaiah 52 was very apropos, seeing as I had a pedicure this morning. My feet are beautiful in the eyes of the world, but my prayer is that they would be beautiful in the eyes of the Lord, as the feet that bring the gospel of peace to the nations.

6 Therefore my people will know my name;
therefore in that day they will know
that it is I who foretold it.
Yes, it is I."

7 How beautiful on the mountains
are the feet of those who bring good news,
who proclaim peace,
who bring good tidings,
who proclaim salvation,
who say to Zion,
"Your God reigns!"

8 Listen! Your watchmen lift up their voices;
together they shout for joy.
When the LORD returns to Zion,
they will see it with their own eyes.

9 Burst into songs of joy together,
you ruins of Jerusalem,
for the LORD has comforted his people,
he has redeemed Jerusalem.

10 The LORD will lay bare his holy arm
in the sight of all the nations,
and all the ends of the earth will see
the salvation of our God.

My heart is overflowing and my soul sings with joy today at my Creator, who has redeemed his people and promises to return to bring us home to him. Praise the Lord today, take a moment to sing aloud to him for all he has done. Feel free to share with me a praise in the Lord you have today! Let's be encouraged by his name and his majestic works!

Any Suggestions?

2007-06-29T15:19:00.000-07:00

I love taking care of my home! Let me preface this post by stating that. I love cleaning, dusting, cooking, taking care of the dishes. All the little things that need to be done to make my home a warm and welcoming haven for guests. I take great delight in creating and restoring order to my home on a daily basis.

BUT. . . And you knew there was a but coming with a setup like that. . . I really don't like laundry. I dread Sunday afternoons when all my other tiding is completed, and I am left with only the dreaded mountain of laundry to face.

Now, in all honesty, I recognize that part of the problem is my wardrobe. I have a shocking quantity of clothing and so can, and often do, go weeks without doing laundry. This makes the chore of laundry that much more arduous when I do finally come face to face with it. . .

I have tried a few things to make it go better, smoother. I sort my clothes into color coded hampers to make it easier to toss in a load. I try to fold, hang and put away everything as soon as it comes out (although the hanging is the one fatal flaw within the system- that's my least favorite part of my least favorite chore). I have my clothing folded, stored, and hung in a very orderly manner so that everything has a place. All these things, most suggestions from others, have helped immensely in developing greater delight in this chore.

I think that part of my problem is that there is no way to redeem this time in ministry pursuits. It's just my own clothes, my own sheets. When washing dishes, cleaning, or doing other household tasks, I can do them while praying for the others that will be or have been on the receiving end of them. Laundry is simply for me. . .

I would really love to hear your input and suggestions on how to redeem this time and joyfully complete this necessary chore.

Yeah!

2007-06-29T15:04:00.000-07:00

Well, after a very emotional week, it is official! My foreign exchange student, S. as I will refer to her here, is coming from Germany for the fall!

Up until a few minutes ago, it looked as though she was not going to be able to come because we were having some difficulties finding a school to place her at, as she was only a semester long student which provided some complications. I have been praying over the last few days that something would come up and arrangements could be made for her to still be able to come. God is so faithful to answer our prayers! My host coordinator just called and let me know that she was officially enrolled in a charter school down the street from my home!

Thank you all for your prayers up to this point, and for your continued prayers as I prepare my home and my heart from the wonderful opportunity!

"He Withholds no good Thing. . ."

2007-06-28T16:24:00.001-07:00

Yesterday, I received a wonderful and lovely email from a friend announcing her engagement. You gentle and kindhearted people are probably thinking, "Oh, wonderful, how marvelous for her. . ." You want to know my first thought? Probably you don't, but I will tell you anyway. My first thought was, "Someone else? When is it going to be my turn? Lord, am I ever going to get married?"

For just a split second, these thoughts and others raced through my mind, careening from my head and nearly reaching my heart to cause a riotous flood of emotions to churn. Thankfully, they only raced for a moment, but were stopped before they could wreak havoc on my peace of mind and trust in God's goodness.

I took a deep breath and let it out. . . I thought back on something that Martha Peace had said in her most recent book, Damsels in Distress. . . She said, (paraphrasing) "We have hurt feelings because we lack self-control over our thoughts. Our emotions are the result of our thoughts, and if we as women can learn to control our thoughts, we can also control our emotions."

This was a time for control. Self-control is a fruit of the Spirit promised to me by God. It is possible. Difficult, but possible.

In times like these, I try to find comfort in the truths of Scripture instead of the lies of the world. . . In Biblical Counseling, they call it "Putting Off and Putting On". . . My favorite truth of scripture to put on is found in Psalm 84:

1 How lovely is your dwelling place, O LORD Almighty!
2 My soul yearns, even faints, for the courts of the LORD;

my heart and my flesh cry out for the living God.
3 Even the sparrow has found a home, and the swallow a nest for herself,

where she may have her young—

a place near your altar, O LORD Almighty, my King and my God.
4 Blessed are those who dwell in your house;

they are ever praising you. Selah
5 Blessed are those whose strength is in you,

who have set their hearts on pilgrimage.
6 As they pass through the Valley of Baca,they make it a place of springs;

the autumn rains also cover it with pools.
7 They go from strength to strength,

till each appears before God in Zion.
8 Hear my prayer, O LORD God Almighty;

listen to me, O God of Jacob.Selah
9 Look upon our shield,O God;

look with favor on your anointed one.
10 Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere;

I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God

than dwell in the tents of the wicked.
11 For the LORD God is a sun and shield;

the LORD bestows favor and honor;

no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless.
12 O LORD Almighty, blessed is the man who trusts in you.

I earnestly believe this truth with my whole heart. God does not withhold any good thing from his children. I am a child of God and he has promised me his very best. HIS very best, not my own feeble estimation of what is best. I need to learn to live in this truth. God's truth says that being married is not good for me right now, that being single is what's very best. So I will rejoice with my friend in her upcoming marriage, and be thankful to God for my singleness. I will lovingly serve others through my singleness, as I serve with all the other gifts that my gracious God has given me. I will praise him and trust him beyond my trust in my own understanding.

My Sister, My Friend

2007-06-28T14:39:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was my sister's 27th birthday. . . This post is in honor of the person I have been closest to for the longest time. I have never known life without her, and that is a marvelous realization!

Even though my sister is not a believer, I can think of three lessons in life I have learned from her, in no particular order. . . The Lord has used her in my life, despite her lack of faith in him, to cause me to have a greater understanding of who I am in him and to that which I am called, for which I will be forever grateful. If my sister can teach me these things, and the Holy Spirit can move in power within me, my God can bring the changes. . .

I've learned the importance of loyalty.

My sister has been my staunchest defender, my most ardent fan, and the one who believed in me above all others. Although, that doesn't mean she wasn't willing to bean me with a hairbrush as the situation necessitated... She has supported me no matter what my choices, no matter what the personal cost to herself. I love her and learn from her loyalty to me and to our family. This is what my loyalty to Christ should be. The one who will never leave me, who knows everything about me and loves me still.

I've learned to love without question or expectation.

All my life my sister has loved me unquestioning and expected nothing from me in return. My love so often comes with expectations, yet my sister pours herself out into me and into others. I have learned from her that loving others means losing yourself to them. We are called, like Paul, to pour out our lives in service to others.

2 Timothy 4

6For I am already being poured out like a drink offering, and the time has come for my departure.

I've learned that caring for someone sometimes means confrontation.

I remember once my senior year in high school my sister called me a liar. Maybe she did not do it with the most love or grace, but she called it like she saw it as it needed to be called. My sister is so secure in her place in my life, and her love for me, that her love is almost brutal in its honesty. Real love for another is willing to convey the truth, because the love of God demands it far above the cost to the relationship. I am a better person, and more in love with my savior, because of the love that compelled others to confront me with my sin.

James 5

19My brothers, if anyone among you wanders from the truth and someone brings him back, 20let him know that whoever brings back a sinner from his wandering will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins.

So, in honor of my sister as she celebrates twenty-seven turns around the sun, this one is for her. I am praying that the next turn around brings only the best to her, only that which would turn her face to Christ and to his redemption. . . I pray that the wisdom of the world which God has given her common grace to know would become true wisdom, learned from God and inacted out of love for him.

A Review and a Reminder

2007-06-27T13:18:00.000-07:00

Just a reminder that John Piper is having his $5 book sale today and tomorrow. I haven't had a chance to check it out, but in honor of the $5 sale, here is a review on my favorite 5...

A couple weeks ago, I loaned my friend Laura my copy of Faithful Women and their Extraordinary God, which came to me highly recommended as well... When I heard about John Piper's book sale, I knew I had to (repeatedly) encourage women to purchase, read and share about this fabulous resource! Here is Laura's review:

I recently read Faithful Women and Their Extraordinary God by Noël Piper. It was such a wonderful encouragement to me and I would strongly recommend it to other believers. Noël documents 5 godly women in our church history. These faithful women including Sarah Edwards, Lilias Trotter, Gladys Aylward, Esther Ahn Kim, and Helen Roseveare challenged me to look at my own faith and to think about the ways that I can make a difference in the lives of others. These women were remarkable and unwavering in their faith. Every one of their stories caused me to think about what it really means to die to yourself and live for Christ. This book reminded me that all believers are not called to serve in the same way, but we are all called to serve with the same heart. If you get a chance pick it up and read it with a friend or your daughter. I think you will be greatly encouraged by 5 women who lived out what they believed despite all the odds.

Thank you dear friend for the wonderful recommendation (not book report). . .

It is the Sovereign Lord. . .

2007-06-26T15:20:00.000-07:00

I've been bumping around a bit in the Bible, but have come back to Isaiah. . .

Today in my reading, I reached Isaiah 50. Consider the following verses. . .

4 The Sovereign LORD has given me an instructed tongue,
to know the word that sustains the weary.
He wakens me morning by morning,
wakens my ear to listen like one being taught.

5 The Sovereign LORD has opened my ears,
and I have not been rebellious;
I have not drawn back.

6 I offered my back to those who beat me,
my cheeks to those who pulled out my beard;
I did not hide my face
from mocking and spitting.

7 Because the Sovereign LORD helps me,
I will not be disgraced.
Therefore have I set my face like flint,
and I know I will not be put to shame.

8 He who vindicates me is near.
Who then will bring charges against me?
Let us face each other!
Who is my accuser?
Let him confront me!

9 It is the Sovereign LORD who helps me.
Who is he that will condemn me?
They will all wear out like a garment;
the moths will eat them up.

10 Who among you fears the LORD
and obeys the word of his servant?
Let him who walks in the dark,
who has no light,
trust in the name of the LORD
and rely on his God.

What encouragement I find here in the words of the prophet Isaiah! This passage takes place within the context of Israel responding to God's admonishment for their sin. This could not be more timely for me. All last week, I was struggling painfully with my sin, often to the point of tears. Everywhere I turned and everywhere I looked, I just kept seeing more of my own sin. I was almost to the point of succumbing to it, honestly, because it just pressed down on me from all sides. I kept trying to push my friends away, and to sit and mope about my sin and my lack of ability to change. Thankfully, my friends would not allow me to as they forced me to be them and be reminded of who I am in Christ and the promises of God which are true in my life.

More importantly, because I am a believer and Christ has purchased my perseverance to the end on the cross, God will not allow me to wallow in my sin either. Praise be to God! As I read in God's word today, the Sovereign Lord has opened my ears, given me an instructed tongue, freed me from my rebellion against him, and helped me.

Those last words are precious to me. God has helped me. Oh how precious is the help he has offered me, and the help he continues to offer me. I am not to grow weary, because my Lord is ever ready to help me, and to cover my weakness with his own strength.

2 Corinthians 12
9But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 10That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Isaiah 40
28 Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.

29 He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.

30 Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;

31 but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,

Hello Hello

2007-06-26T15:02:00.000-07:00

Well, this is going to be a short post. Once you see my before and after cleaning pictures you will know why!

I have a mountain of laundry and a ton of paperwork to take care of this evening before I can allow myself the luxury of posting some new entries. . . I have been grossly neglecting my housekeeping chores, and must tackle those this evening. When all of that is finished, I will be back at the blogging. That's my reward to myself for finishing!

Thanks for all of your great comments! I look forward to all that you have to say, and have a couple new posts in mind already!

Just a Few Minutes. . .

2007-06-24T16:25:00.001-07:00

The fake family and I are having a great time in Flagstaff with our fake parents, the most encouraging older folks on the planet! I'll have to post about some of our times this weekend, and the wonderful fellowship we have had, but hopefully these pictures will hold you over until Monday!

Here are some pictures of my two older nephews playing outside after waking up this morning. They had a great time playing!

While we were beating the heat, we were able to see some truly beautiful sights.
Flowers especially speak to me because their very existence is a reminder of how fleeting our time here is.

Seeing them reminds me of the truth of Isaiah in chapter 40,

6 A voice says, "Cry out."
And I said, "What shall I cry?"
"All men are like grass,
and all their glory is like the flowers of the field.

7 The grass withers and the flowers fall,
because the breath of the LORD blows on them.
Surely the people are grass.

8 The grass withers and the flowers fall,
but the word of our God stands forever."

Here are some of the most beautiful flowers we saw. Thanks for the pictures Uncle Joel. . .

These ones were growing up through the gravel. . .

I love the vibrancy of these purple blossoms. . .

Nothing beats the endless blue skies stretching out in a vast expanse above you. . .

I saved the dandelions for last, because they are my favorite! Everyone keeps telling me that these are weeds, but you cannot convince me. Their frailty and delicacy speaks to me, as well as their strength and durability as they travel countless distances to make certain their lasting legacy. . .

I Sure Hope he Likes Cows!

2007-06-23T15:40:00.000-07:00

I was feeling kinda down on Friday, so Laura had my nephews Jacob and Joshua send me an email. I laughed so hard I thought I'd share them with you. . .

Sarah,

I love you and I miss you. Sometimes I want to play with you. Bye, Bye. Sarah I love you and I miss you. That is a really funny story you wrote. I love you and I miss you good bye Auntie. You smell like a banana and I love you and I miss you. Sometimes I want to play with you but not a lot of times. I love when I can come over to your house. And when I can have a sleep over. We should have a sleep over tonight.

From,

Jacob (age 4)

I like you like a cow.

From,

Joshua (age 3)

Can't say much else after that!!

A Recommendation from Out of Town

2007-06-23T15:37:00.000-07:00

My friend Matt from church wrote this very encouraging blog recently. I just wanted to share it with you in hopes that you too will be encouraged by it. . . The theme is basically that we are not what we used to be, or what we are about to be. . .

I Love a Bargain!

2007-06-22T22:13:00.000-07:00

Just in time for summer reading by the pool. Take a little time to head on over to the Desiring God Blog on June 27th and June 28th. Word on the street is that every book will be $5. I'm not sure why, but I'm stocking up! I often give these books to friends as gifts or tools for growth. . . Happy Reading!

How Can I Love my Family More?

2007-06-22T15:40:00.000-07:00

My older sister called me to task today with regard to my demonstration of love for my family, and now I would like to ask for some advice. . .

I live about 45 minutes away from my family, but the distance might as well be 45 planets in some regards. My family are not believers. I am actively involved in my family and the disparity between my church family and my biological family could oftentimes not be more great. . .

Yet, this is the family my Father has called me to love and to serve. Typically, I have tried to spend time with my family by attending family events and by trying to practice hospitality towards them. I talk weekly with each of my parents, usually separately. . . I attempt to spend time individually with each of my siblings monthly (although this does fall by the wayside when we cannot think of anything to do together or when schedules conflict. . .) But it seems like the distance just continues to grow. I really do desire to bridge the chasm between us to build relationship and also so that I can ultimately reflect the gospel to them. But first, I have to find ways to make them see my love for them.

Those of you with unbelieving family or friends, please share? How do you reach your family? I am earnestly seeking new ways. Please let me know what has worked (or not worked). I know this is not a formulaic matter, but maybe I could measure your tools against my family and find some creative new ways to serve my family in love.

Changes.

2007-06-22T15:30:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I have a few minutes while the kiddies I am temporarily nannying for are napping. . .

Today was my last day at my job. Earlier in the school year, I decided to change schools for a host of different reasons, all of them good. I prayed about it, considered the options, received counsels from the elders of my church. I know that what I am doing is a wonderful change that will bring countless new opportunities to minister and serve. I am so excited about the changes that are coming my way in the next few weeks, and as the new school year dawns.

But there is still a bitter sweetness to the transition. . . As I close this chapter of my life and open a new one, I think back on all of my fond memories. For just a second I question whether this is the "right" choice. Then I stop. None of the choices I was facing with regard to work were sinful, and so I have freedom to choose whichever one. Now that I have chosen, my choice has become God's will by virtue of being chosen! Now, I need to rest confidently in God's sovereignty over all.

I have been meditating on the following passage from Ecclesiastes 3, which has been intensely encouraging through my emotional day. . .

9 What does the worker gain from his toil?
10 I have seen the burden God has laid on men.
11 He has made everything beautiful in its time.
He has also set eternity in the hearts of men;
yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end.
12 I know that there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live.
13 That everyone may eat and drink,
and find satisfaction in all his toil—this is the gift of God.
14 I know that everything God does will endure forever;
nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it.
God does it so that men will revere him.

This just reminds me of my purpose. It focuses me on the ultimate goal, regardless of the venue and is true for all of us in all we do. Thanks be to God for the refuge of his truth and the encouragement we can find there.

See You on Sunday!

2007-06-22T00:58:00.000-07:00

All right, with those two posts, I want to let you know that I'm checking out till Sunday!

After a week of 110F and higher, my fake family and I are headed up and out of the heat to Flagstaff to visit our fake parents! We will be gone until Sunday evening, and I don't know if I will have access or ambition to blog while there... Feel free to post comments, as I can moderate those from my phone...

Have a marvelous weekend, and I will see you all in a few days.

Ebbs and Flows

2007-06-22T00:49:00.000-07:00

Today (well what used to be today) was the longest day of the year. Really, it actually scientifically was. Thinking about today being the longest day of the year caused me to reflect on life. Life in general as well as my life specifically.

Today was the longest day of the year, and I raced through it at my regular breakneck pace. I try to pack my days full of as much as is humanly possible. Sometimes too much, my dear friends would attest to! But I think about what James says in his letter. . .

James 4:

All our lives are simply a blink of God's eye in the span of eternity. . . The longest day of the year means nothing when compared with the whole of a person's life or the totality of human existence. As the days once again being to grower shorter, remember that they really are short in the truest sense. Whatever you are filling your days with, be mindful that your Lord knows the exact number of your days on Earth. Make your days count not just in our estimation, but in God's as well.